Paris: Part Le Deux

So let’s get back to Paris,...

We woke up last Saturday to gray skies and a chilly wind, Fall had begun in Paris. Chung and I got up and put pants on and went to the basement of the Kyriad Clichy to enjoy our complimentary breakfast. There was a sign in the elevator stating that the hotel would, “Waken us gently with a hearty breakfast.” From the moment that Chung translated the PrintShop Deluxe masterpiece, I wondered how true to their word they would be. I haven’t been “gently woken” in, well, my life time. Just the thought of it made me wonder, “who the hell gets gently woken anyway and how can I get in to their bed?” If Kyriad Clichy was going to make such a claim, I was going to make them put their money (in this case a chocolate croissant) where their (in this case, my mouth) mouth was. Simply said, the Kyriad Clichy is all talk. The croissant was a little more then lack luster and their artificial sweetener was very questionable. We ate quickly and went back up to our room to shower.

Our bathroom had just been redone and it was nice to get a warm shower and blow out my fro. Chung’s Chucks were still quite wet so I dried them for her after I had finished with my locks. That’s what I call friendship.

Our first stop was the Champs Elysees, or what I like to call, Paris’ Strip Mall. It was morning, and still kind of crisp as we walked up towards the Arc de Triumph. The Champs Elysees is know for it’s shopping but Chung and I weren’t all too impressed.

The Arc de Triumph is more a testament to insane driving then anything else. There are no lanes and it is just one big roundabout, it looks like one big free for all for tiny french cars. We crossed the street and went in to a couple stores but were just disappointed.

My parents had wanted to buy Chung and I lunch at Laduree, a very old and famous pastry shop/restaurant. Laduree is amazing, the epitome of french baking and having them want to buy us lunch was not only generous but just really nice. They however weren’t serving lunch, they were serving brunch and Chung and I had only just begun shopping and needed something substantial. We left Laduree, promising to come back for breakfast the next day and went to a bistro around the corner.

The bistro was crap and it was obvious from the moment we walked in. Chung ordered a large salad and I made the grave mistake of ordering a steak. I LOVE steak, steak, salad and french fries, nothing better. My steak came, and it was burnt and my fries were thick in nature. I was disappointed but Chung and I ate and left. It was probably only about twenty minutes though before my stomach started to hate on me. Fuck you, Bistro!

My stomach luckily calmed it’s self and Chung and I continued our shopping tour of Paris. I had mentioned I was looking for a new purse for this up coming Fall/Winter season and thanks to Chung’s trained eye, I gave up a good $80, but gained a sweet piece of arm candy. Well, maybe not candy, it’s black, and could house a baby or small armadillo comfortably.

After our time on the Champs Elysees we headed over to the Eiffel Tower. It turned out to be a beautiful Fall day, with the leaves changing color and a slight breeze as we walked down perfectly Parisian streets. It was nice, yet hurtful looking at all the amazing apartments that we will most likely never get the chance to live in.

There isn’t much to say about our time at the Eiffel Tower, it was what it was. It’s bigger then you might think, I’ve seen it three times now and am still kind of surprised at it’s size. We didn’t go up to the top because there was a two hour wait and it costs as much as a pair of cheap heels. We headed for the Metro, next stop Les Galleries Lafayette.

Les Galleries Lafayette is one of the largest department stores in the world, bigger then Harrods. It is HUGE and even I find myself overwhelmed upon entering it. I don’t recall how many stories it has, but it’s massive. It houses not one building, but three; Women’s, Men’s and House Wear, all kitty-corner to each other. We entered the Women’s store and barely saw half of the ground floor. It was PACKED, not just with people but with a vast assortment of merchandise. We made our way through accessories, jewelry and hand bags, not even getting anywhere close to shoes, let alone clothes. What was really cool though was that in Cosmetics they had a stage set up with a jazz band and two dancers performing. There were two make-up artists making two innocent tourists up as whores, and all of this was just for the arrival of M.A.C.’s Fall palette.

We made our way over to the Men’s store, I was looking for a scarf for my man, when we heard some yelling. It turned out that the store had actually got a group of male models to act as rugby players, staging a game in the middle of the accessories section. We didn’t find anything but some played out Burberry so we headed out and were met by a crowd of women huddled in front of the store window. It seems that the “rugby players” had headed into the window display, which was set up as a locker room, and they were “getting ready to hit the showers.” It was hilarious and I couldn’t stop laughing. Talk about French! My favorite of the models had to be the guy who had a small circle tattooed around his belly button with two thin rams horns sticking out. Talk about a Tattoo. I have seen some odd/sad tattoos while over here in Europe, but NOTHING like this sweet piece of artistry. I dragged Chung away from the window but not without catching a smile from Navel Ram Horn (as I named my new found, rugby-model friend).

Chung and I had to go pick up some tea for Dr. Sylvia and then soon headed home to Kyriad Clichy. On the way to the Metro there was a street team putting up signs for the new Bakar album that was suppose to drop the next day. I told Chung stories of my time growing up with Bakar, down on the block. She was greatly amused by my tale and it some how made our trip home a bit quicker, or so I like to believe.

We got back to Clichy and went back to the hotel to drop off our loot. We had been shopping for ten hours at this point and had already decided that regardless of how we might be judged, we were getting ourselves some Le Petite Chicken Sandwiches from the McDonalds pimps and heading back for some French tv. Chung made us go into the local grocery store, Casino, for fruit.

As a rule Chung carries fruit with her at all times. It’s either an apple, four nectarines, some grapes or if in season maybe a bag of cherries. I don’t know what’s wrong with her, but the girl doesn’t seem to be able to travel without a pound of fruit on her. Casino was amazing though. There is NO better way to get to know a country then looking at where they buy there everyday items (I highly suggest looking at the pre-made meal section). There was all sorts of crazy shit in there, bottled fish soup, crepes, mini-shot cans of Coke, everything, it was awesome.

After a bag of grapes, three packs of gum, some ice tea, and one of the mini Cokes, we headed for our McBistro of choice.

The Pimps were in their suits, suede shoes and all, and our Le Petite Chicken Sandwiches were hot and ready. We walked back to Kyriad Clichy and after waiting about five minutes before they let us in (shady-ass Receptionist who had given us the wrong room key earlier, must have been boozing in the basement because she smelled a bit Funk). We headed up to our room and fell asleep watching the Scotland vs. Italy Rugby match.

We woke up the next morning, packed our stuff and headed straight to Laduree for chocolate croissants and coffee. Breakfast was fine, the coffee was amazing, the service was crap. We went and did a bit more shopping, but seeing as it was a Sunday not much was open. We searched and searched for a Starbucks, so Chung could get her sister a mug, but believe it or not, and I was really shocked by this, we couldn't find one. We headed over to the train station, got some food and boarded our TGV back to Basel, and that was Paris.

I missed my first train back to Luzern by minutes, so Chung was nice enough to get some Blackberry juice with me across the street at Frey’s. Afterward we hugged, made plans to go to Herbst Masse in a couple weeks and said good bye.





A true friend will blow-dry your Chucks for you.


Chung, looking like a communist.


Strutin' Paris.



Can't you just feel Chung's excitement sitting under the Eiffle tower?


Like I need to explain this one.


Navel Ram Horn and his "mates."


Back to the Kyriad Clichy!