Bitch Was Lucky She Didn't Get Smacked

Yesterday sucked, really, really, hard. Within the second hour at work I almost lost my shit. I take so much verbal and physical abuse, something that I am not happy about but take for the sake of my future. But here is my Boss’ daughter berating me for the stupidest thing (my not finding a piece of Brioche dough in the freezer) and not letting up. It was finally at her comment that “I am old enough” to find it. That’s when I was ready to punch her in chubby fucking face. She just kept going and going and even at one point my Boss told her to let up. I was shaking I was so mad, but I kept forming my Brioche and didn’t say anything. Atone point she complimented me on my Brioche, but then a moment later put her face right into mine and and said, “You don’t really like me today, do you?” My Boss was standing right next to me so I knew whatever I was about to say would mostly likely play a role in the next nine months. It was lame because what I wanted to say was, “Actually Bitch, I haven’t liked your fat ass since the day we met. You are subhuman to me, you are nothing, you’re family is nothing, you have made me life at times, and I wish nothing positive for your future. So, to answer you idiotic question, yes, I do not like you today, not get out of my face before I choke you with a Brioche.” But my sister sits in the back of my mind (she is my acting conscience, most of the time) and I changed my response to, “It doesn’t matter if I like you or not, I am here to learn and do my job, and not to be talked down to like a child.” That was it. It takes me so much to keep the fury in and not rip off the bitch’s face, but my Brioche came out perfectly and that was what was really important. That’s all I could give, but the rest of the day she was as sweet as sugar.

The rest of the day i was just tired and beat, literally. By the time I got home and got in the shower I noticed that I am covered with random scratches, welts, bruises and minor cuts I have been left with as memories from this week, baking is a dangerous business. Kind of looks like I was caught in some sort of street fight with a gnome. I spent my Friday evening watching The Office and a new episode of American Gangster. I turned the lights off at seven-thirty and didn’t feel too bad about it.

Skipper called me at around ten, I remember talking to her, but I don’t remember what I said, I was too out of it. It was just nice hearing her voice, all I had wanted the whole day was to be on the balcony, Cola Light in hand. Talking it all out, the whole day, the last two weeks, would have been able to put things in perspective, but it just wasn’t an option.

I am getting in the shower in a few minutes. I woke up at six and watched another episode of American Gangster and painted my nails. I haven’t had a morning like this in a while, one to just wallowing the dark and cold morning hours. It brings me back to last year. I am heading to Basel this morning, going to visit Grossi and Grossvati and go to Herbst Masse with Chung. Herbst Masse always makes me miss Dr. Sylvia. We have gone a couple times together and she always bought me a bratwurst and cotton candy, I miss that lady.

I hope everyone has a good and safe weekend.
I’m not proof-reading this because it’s the weekend.