Filled With Beauty

I am ending this work week, tired and with a very swollen and blue knee (I ate shit at work yesterday slipping on a wet spot, turning a corner). Either way, this week sucked, and I have this weekend off, only to go in for six hours tomorrow to prep some stuff for my bake-off. I am now sitting in my desk chair, wearing Harold, listening to Johnny Cash.

My bake-off is continuing to slowly decay my mind. All I think about it baking. At night I lay awake thinking of different cake decorations, or recipes, or time plans. It doesn't stop and I am stressing happy thoughts. Every couple years I go through these periods of having to face big challenges alone (ok, I think the same goes for everyone), and this is just one of those times. Skipper keeps reminding me what this whole experience is turning me into and I can't help but love to hear it. I need to hear it. I hate the thought that I am just knocking down days, living to be free from having to be anywhere. I can't wait to be able to just go wherever I want to. I can't wait to finally be able to be with my family and friends again! To be able to just go home. To have the freedom to leave. Just typing it out makes my heart swell and reminds me why I go in on my days off: three more months and I am gold.

I am heading to Basel tomorrow evening, Frau is dropping me off at my grandparents, and then Sunday morning I plan on spending my morning-afternoon on the Rhein: warm weather, water, and little bit of haze. It's suppose to be in the low 70's, the warmest day since October, and there is no place I rather be then sitting on the Rhein. Out of all the things I am going to miss about Switzerland, sunny days on the Rhein will probably be in the top three.

It's Friday night, and I am rocking a tight fro. Backgammon, Vodka Sours, gold cocktail rings, men who wear scarves, the ice crusher: these are my happy thoughts.